tempusfrangit: (Default)
Tina ([personal profile] tempusfrangit) wrote2014-04-18 01:19 pm

(no subject)

Anotehr one of the fic things. Brad gave me THE ROCK




DWAYNE JOHNSON AKA THE ROCK
AS
BALDR


They warned me not to come here. Through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered I fought my way here to the- no, that was the mortal movie Labyrinth. But still they told me not to come here, they warned me but I came. For it was my duty and my quest and so I followed the directions given to me by my brother. I traversed the entire length of an infinite maze, I beat the undefeatable sphinx of riddles and conquered the evilest dudes imaginable all so that I could-

"Hi, I'd like to return these library books please." I said, breath drawing quick as I stared up at the... Librarian. This guy was no Library Assistant (I'd already defeated those bozos back in the untranslatable aisle of four hundreds) but a genuine Librarian. Who to be honest was pretty stacked in the dude man-arm-candy kind of way and technically pecs too. "Look I travelled the infinite maze, I defeated the sphinx of riddles, I conquered the evil overlords and the library assistants of terror... can I just return these books?"

The guy looked at me, his eyes darkening in sheer unadulterated scariness. He pushed his chair back, name badge (Baldr... huh) glinting in the gloom filled room. He towered over me as I cowered back, tacking a breath before he... before he... oh, smiled. And turned a light on... whaaaat?

The room lit up revealing the gleaming white of IKEA shelves, the state of the art computers, the- the- the STARBUCKS.

"Sure thing, geez you did all that? Huh, I suppose that's one way to come to the Great Hall of Endless Knowledge." Baldr said while I continued to stare in... awe. He was magnificent. "But you know I never get why no one just parks out front, it's a two minute drive from the gate."

"What?" I yelled. My eyes filled of the weeks of horror, the friends I had lost, the blood I had shed, the tears I had cried... all for this. All for nothing. "There's a BACK ENTRANCE?!"

"No, there's a front entrance. You came in through the back entrance, it's scary as all Hel out there. Are you okay Princess?"

"Yeah, yeah sure I'm just- I'm just going to kill my brother. Just-just a little." I say, watching as Baldr checked the books in. I was going to kill my brother- I was going to kill him.

"Yeah, you're not going to like this but there's a balance to pay..."

I WAS GOING TO KILL LOKI.

****fin****


PRINCESS THORA THE ADVENTURER/BALDR THE LIBRARIAN FOREVER. :p


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